9. Challenging Faith
I just lost a friend.
He is the head of Kolping Family, a sizable Catholic Action movement. The organization desperately needs his life time, to quickly train a successor to continue to lead the movement. A few days ago, I sent an email urging him to be careful at home, absolutely not contacting anyone. In just a few more days, there will be a Covid-19 vaccine.
Why do I know so many people already vaccinated? I asked and he replied he was waiting for his turn.
The only way is to ask God for help.
Those who were vaccinated early, mainly because they had turned to their acquaintances in health care service and didn’t have to queue for a shot. They have been safe…
He listened to me and was very carefully. But he was infected with Covid-19 from an unknown source and the worst incident happened. I was bewildered and could not understand what God was doing.
In recollection of the old days, on January 1st every year, together with the diocese, our parish used to gather in a Mass for peace. A friend of mine blurted out, “I won’t go next year, because asking is in vain …
What effect do our prayers have for things we consider the very best? Impossible prayers! (L’impossible prière!).
Not only us, but the saints, sometimes fall into such a pessimistic mood. Faith is tested by God in “dark nights of the soul” when we are cold, doubtful and disappointed.
Faith is not easy, especially how to put faith in practice…
- Mature faith requires commitment and tests:
Mature faith requires taking part in tests. It is clear that God wants it. We have no doubt about this.
The Bible recounts countless clear and vivid examples. Here are a few:
- The Jews had to undergo purification and tests in the desert for 40 years, while it should have taken them only 11 days to reach the promised land. Because “how stiff-necked they are” (Ex 32:9).
- With God’s permission, Satan tormented Job: from a wealthy healthy boss to bankruptcy and family separation. The body is repulsive and disgusting. “He took a potsherd to scrape himself” (Job 2:8). In extreme poverty his wife had to reproach him, “Curse God and die!” (Job 2:9)
- Even Leader Moses, to whom God was revealed in the burning thorny bush, who was given the staff to perform many miracles in the land of Egypt, who brought the Israelites across the red sea, who met the Lord on Mount Sinai and received the tablet of the Ten Commandments for the people, was in doubt sometimes.
The Lord told Moses to hit the rock with a stick so that the water would spring up for the people and the animals to use, and he had to hit it twice. Moses was shown the promised land by God, but he was not allowed in because of his poor performance of faith.
- Peter, the great apostle of Jesus, witnessed the innumerable miracles the Lord performed. He was once shown the transfiguration on Mount Tabor. But when going on the sea, he sank into the water due to a moment of doubt.
- And there was the dramatic test of faith God gave Abraham, who is known as the father of believers. Certainly no one would pass this kind of test.
“God put Abraham to the test and said to him: Abraham! “Here I am!” he replied. Then God said: Take your son Isaac, your only one, whom you love, and go to the land of Moriah. There offer him up as a burnt offering on one of the heights that I will point out to you” (Gen 22:1-2).
Abraham thought to himself: Isaac is the only heir, to whom his wife gave birth at an old age. But how could God promise his descendants as numerous as the stars in the sky, if it weren’t for him.
Despite his vague thought and confusion, Abraham still obeyed God’s command.
The broken-hearted father took Isaac up the mountain and was determined to slaughter his beloved son with his cattle-slaughtering knife.
Overcoming the test, Abraham was chosen by God as the father of many nations: “Through you shall all the nations be blessed” (Ga 3:8), as the father of believers: “Those who rely on faith are the children of Abraham” (Ga 3:7), and as “the friend of God” (Jas 2:23).
It is a tough test of faith. The challenge is even more difficult when facing an invisible Being.
- A hidden God:
We are flesh and blood people. We only experience the world through the five senses, hearing and seeing. God is different because He creates all things, controls time, but He belongs to the spirit world.
God is transcendent, He is spirit and no one can see Him.
To show the Jews His presence, the Lord said to Moses about the preparation of the covenant: “I am coming to you now in a dense cloud, so that when the people hear me speaking with you, they will also remain faithful to you” (Ex 19:9).
“Moses led the people out of the camp to meet God, and they stationed themselves at the foot of the mountain. Now Mount Sinai was completely enveloped in smoke, because the LORD had come down upon it in fire” (Ex 19:17-18).
In Jewish history, sometimes for several hundred years, God was silent and did not send a prophet to say anything to them.
He is hidden and silent: “Truly with you God is hidden, the God of Israel, the savior!” (Is 45:15).
The story of King Saul’s disloyalty to God and God’s indifference is worth thinking about:
“When Saul saw the Philistine camp, he grew afraid and lost heart completely. He consulted the LORD; but the LORD gave no answer, neither in dreams nor by Urim nor through prophets. Then Saul said to his servants, “Find me a medium through whom I can seek counsel” (1 Samuel 28:5-7).
It’s not uncommon for us to be as disappointed as Saun, who, when he saw God’s silence, went to find fortune tellers, necromancers, and talismans. The devil loves that and just wait for opportunities.
It seems that God is out of signals, but He is always beside us, closer than ever, even though we can’t see Him.
He is not an idol for us to annoy with supplication, like inanimate idols or sleazy evil gods with manipulating witchcraft.
God is silent but does He act?
- God’s way:
God has His plan and His plan is transcendent:
“For my thoughts are not your thoughts, nor are your ways my ways” (Is 55:8).
“For as the heavens are higher than the earth, so are my ways higher than your ways, my thoughts higher than your thoughts” (Is 55:9).
God gave man wisdom to understand His existence and authority, and gave him the freedom to accept responsibility for his destiny. He doesn’t appear to show His authority or to interfere with human self-determination, which must be respected to be meaningful.
Our vision is local and short term. Contrary to God’s overall and long-term vision.
The book of Proverbs also says, “Trust in the LORD with all your heart, on your own intelligence do not rely” (Pr 3:5).
The most arduous of this war is none other than the steadfast faith in the infinitely wise strategy of God, our ultimate Savior, and our wondrous Providence.
Experience has shown that it is often long after an event that we feel its rationality and partly experience the wisdom of an arranging Supreme Mind.
As Phan Boi Chau said: “If the road of life is flat, heroes are no more heroic than anyone else.” In order to win the laurels of the victor, it is impossible not to experience the hardships of the war.
Jesus set an example for us.
I envision a God who is a benevolent loving Father.
“If you then, who are wicked, know how to give good gifts to your children, how much more will your heavenly Father give good things to those who ask him” (Mt 7:11).
He quickly hides himself behind the door, but track our every step, watch us like a toddler and is ready to hug and comfort us when we stumble.
“LORD, you have probed me, you know me:
You know when I sit and stand;
You understand my thoughts from afar. …
Even before a word is on my tongue,
LORD, you know it all. …
Such knowledge is too wonderful for me,
Far too lofty for me to reach” (Ps 13:1-6).
Many times we are stubborn so He wants us to fall a little, learn from our own experiences, and grow from there. He cleverly heals us, but does not behave like some Vietnamese mothers who rub the lump on the child’s forehead and curse the table that hurts the child.
Maturity is self-determination, hard work, creativity and self-responsibility.
As I am speaking to you here, I am also convinced that I am on a pilgrimage to my heaven home on bumpy roads, on the promised path of hope … You don’t expect to be satisfied with anything absolute in this temporal world … As Saint Augustine writes in his Confessions: “You have made me for You, so my heart is restless until it rests in You”.
Such is the human condition…